THE GIRL THAT I KNOW IN CLAMPETT

A "Teen Angst" Filk Song based on the world from the novels _Bait & Switch_ and _The Painted Cat_. Both books by Austen Crowder. No copyright infringement was intended.

Done in a style of a 1950s teenage heart-throb ballad

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There is a girl that I know in Clampett, once mine.
When she was human, ev'ry thing was just fine.
But then one day she made a change.
The town reacted very strange.
Now for the girl that I know in Clampett, I pine.

You see, the girl that I know in Clampett's a toon.
Just one weekend she became a raccoon.
I still would live to hold her tight
Perhaps to pet her fur so bright
But then the girl that I know in Clampett was ruined.

And so she went off to a library node.
The girl I know was forced to hit the road.
Now tell me God does that seem fair?
Outcast for extra body hair?
The lovely girl that I know in Clampett, left cold.

About the girl that I know in Clampett, once mine,
I wish to help her, to make her feel fine.
They broke her down, and that was then.
I wish to build her up again.
By me, the girl that I know in Clampett's just fine.

So the girl that I know in Clampett, please wait.
I'm coming over. I hope I'm not late.
Although the fumes might make me faint
For you I'm willing to toonpaint
And if I turn too, well I guess that's just fate.

There is a girl that I know in Clampett, once mine.
When she was human, ev'rything was just fine.
I hope to live with her one day.
Make up for all she's had to pay.
'Cause for the girl that I know in Clampett, I pine.